Mysteries unveiled

Chemo or chemical therapy was a huge mystery to us and some of it still is. On the way to the chemo centre the first time I let Cindi know that I expected her to be locked in a glass room, lots of machinery sparking and fog and stuff, her banging at the door to get out - then silence and eventually her coming through the door looking like a female version of the Hulk. This did not happen.
There were nice soft reclining chairs, crackers and juice and pop, nice people working there and loads of others receiving their treatments as well.
This first round (4 sessions) of chemo happens in 2 parts. It's called AC - the A standing for one long winded drug name and the C for another. One goes in via 3 large needles full of what looks like red koolaid and the other is a small bag that is hung on one of those cool hospital hangy things and slowly drips into the saline going into Cindi's arm. There's also a steroid added. Lots of drugs! I guess this is one time we don't say no to drugs. There's day before drugs, day of drugs and 3 day after drugs all to deal with the main event drugs going in. There's also the little $2300 syringe of booster juice drug (I call it) that works on her white blood cells and boosts her immune system the day after. Pretty darn amazing if you ask me.
The side effects of each drug can be kind of brutal but Cindi has been a real trooper. We are at day 11 today after the first chemo event and she's doing pretty well. This week she had more cat scans, some radioactive drinks to help those along as well as a day surgery to put in a porta-cath ( a little plastic bulb put under her skin in her chest to allow blood to be taken from and the drug administered to without the necessity of needle after needle in the arms) My wife looks like a war veteran at times, tired and sore and bandaged up...but this too shall pass.
Then, of course, there's the mystery of God and prayer in the midst of this. Some people are praying for strength and endurance for us. Some are praying for healing. Some people don't know what to pray for. It's a bit of a mystery talking with the Creator of the Universe about stuff like this.
Cindi and I have talked to many people about our position with God in this. We want to celebrate Him in our lives no matter what. This suffering has drawn us and others closer to Him - and this is good. Some people believe that if they pray enough, or the right way or with a specific focus, healing and miracles will happen. Some people believe that prayer simply doesn't work - that God doesn't hear our prayers or that God isn't even there. Everyone believes in something and we are grateful for all prayers.

We choose to believe in God and in His sovereignty over our lives. What does that mean? For us it means that if Cindi gets better we will be thankful for that and wonder what he has in store for the next part of our journey. For us it also means if she doesn't get better we will be thankful for that and His grace and mercy and the privilege to love Him in the midst of the suffering, letting others know that it is not just the answer to prayer that we praise Him for but simply the privilege to love Him along this road.
Do we pray? Yes we do. We ask Him to forgive us and to know how grateful we are for this life, for His son, for His love and for the privilege of loving Him while we're on this earth. This hard road has helped us to gain perspective in that. Come what may, we will praise Him till our dying breathe - be that sooner or later. We choose to live in His grace and love. How about you?